This week has been exceptional. Drew some tattoos on friends that other friends made permanent, wrestled a huge hackberry tree into kindling, saved a persimmon tree from an overly passionate passionflower vine, found autumn (it's been hiding for ages).
All day today off to add further to this list of pleasures...including but not limited to, art, dying lace curtains with turmeric root, making prickly pear jelly, contact papering my bedroom wall, and assembling my growing insect collection. Holy holy is the day!
Sunday, September 5, 2010
Ammending the Soil
I'm startleable and excited all the time. It's good and I will not be disappointed if the startler is just a leaf vine or a ghost - or the wind in the trees. Because I embrace my time and opportunity for solitude and self education.
I feel wild like Tigerlily, and I want to un-tame myself now. I want to leave my hair a mess, run around half undressed and half dressed like a man - I want to kick things over with my boots and call like a warrior and howl at the moon.
I AM the person I want to be- though sometimes behind closed lips. I don't need to feel that I am understood, but I shouldn't either shy away for the fear of confusing or putting people off all the more.
Middle of the road, detached, fluid, existing in the pure light of all I am and nothing more but certainly nothing less. Romantic? Not I, perhaps only here.
I ENJOY! And I REVEL! and I REBEL! And I swoon and allure and consume! CHA!!!!!
The train doesn't sound the same. Even the hisssss. The thick air must muffle it. But does it still know me? Though I clearly remember it. I CAN still tame it. Rather, it will still take me wherever I should like to go. Just like a past lover, who loves unchanging but unpossessingly - and I may call on it when it pleases me because no matter the distance and time apart we. are. devoted.
In the areas where I am otherwise distracted, I need to fill in the spaces between - as precious and savory as the distractions might be. I continue to build my own foundation with the expectation that eventually it will be all I have, and in anticipation that one day, maybe even soon, this that I consider so savory will be no more.
...and when it is, I will find something new, and I will become excited again.
I feel wild like Tigerlily, and I want to un-tame myself now. I want to leave my hair a mess, run around half undressed and half dressed like a man - I want to kick things over with my boots and call like a warrior and howl at the moon.
I AM the person I want to be- though sometimes behind closed lips. I don't need to feel that I am understood, but I shouldn't either shy away for the fear of confusing or putting people off all the more.
Middle of the road, detached, fluid, existing in the pure light of all I am and nothing more but certainly nothing less. Romantic? Not I, perhaps only here.
I ENJOY! And I REVEL! and I REBEL! And I swoon and allure and consume! CHA!!!!!
The train doesn't sound the same. Even the hisssss. The thick air must muffle it. But does it still know me? Though I clearly remember it. I CAN still tame it. Rather, it will still take me wherever I should like to go. Just like a past lover, who loves unchanging but unpossessingly - and I may call on it when it pleases me because no matter the distance and time apart we. are. devoted.
In the areas where I am otherwise distracted, I need to fill in the spaces between - as precious and savory as the distractions might be. I continue to build my own foundation with the expectation that eventually it will be all I have, and in anticipation that one day, maybe even soon, this that I consider so savory will be no more.
...and when it is, I will find something new, and I will become excited again.
There is so much we can learn from eachother without speaking.
I want to communicate telepathically. I don't want to manipulate, I want to connect. And I want us to do this together - like two star siblings who fell to earth in the same place and in the same time.
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